The other side of fear

I remember wanting so badly to be brave enough to jump into a swimming pool. Going to swim for the first time at about the age of fourteen, I felt so bold being able to hold my breath under the shallow end of the pool. The first time in my late twenties, jumping into the deep end of a lake was heart-wrenching. I remember like it was yesterday; that fear of drowning still plagues me to this day.
Threading through fear and the narratives we come up with is no simple task. There is a voice within that fills us up with so much possibility. Our head fills with words emphasizing what could be. When that voice stops speaking; fear finds its way in, we stop and overthink. We supply our hearts with doubt and drown the endless possibilities in excuses and procrastination. There is little room for great feats when doubt and worry rule your heart.
In the past few years, I have jumped off diving boards, off cliffs into lakes, snorkelled in the pacific, and gone for swims in the north Atlantic. These experiences my younger self would balk at just the thought of. I have come to realize that the fear hasn’t left. The voice inside still whispers every time, telling me how much of a bad idea it is. I have become a better swimmer from overcoming that fear and jumping in, and I continue to improve. Situations and people we encounter can drive us forward or slow us down. We are reminded of why we set out to succeed or why we may have been wrong to ever start. Constraints are a necessary condition for creativity to occur, and our fear can push us to learn and grow.